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[Y] Kristy's Life: Chapter One
4 Comments
13 Votes
3 Favourites
Sexuality Female Solo
Submitted On Jun8/10
Hits 4157
Summary:
Kristy's life is bland and boring, but she finds a way to spice up her routine and bring exitement back into her world.
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[Y] Excerpt

Water thundered down the wide stream, the surface swirling and foaming. A dark figured moved below the white torrent, darting between the boulders and down the thunderous falls. A dam spanned the width of the river about a mile down, releasing jets of water through tubes and varying the river's speed. The water increased it's speed as the river inclined and the jets strengthened. The dark mass along under the water's surface. It quickly reached the dam, touched the hard stone and triggered an alert. Flashes of blue raced across the sky and the words "Simulation Ended" appeared in bold letters on the side of the dam. The world melted away to reveal metallic walls with windows scattering their sides. The dark figure, no longer eveloped in, was now in clear view of onlookers. It was a slender creature that appeared to be a hybrid between otter and a phoenix, female and about twenty five years of age. She sported a lean, thin body. Brown fur covered her back and tail, while her front and le...
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Comments
[Spartan907]
It was pretty good, I look forward to the second one.
Top score. Maybe something with the delivery boy in a later chapter?
[Aaralyn Mcalister]
I really enjoyed reading this. I would like to know more about her reasoning for being an experiement and how long she has been doing it. I may have missed that since Im on some meds at the moment, but if thats not in there then that would be nice. Just develope the character a little more so that when shes touching herself it brings more emotion into it. People will be able to feel the pleasure better. I totally understand the lack of time to extend out details but I thought with how well you write this could have been dragged out deliciously longer. Especially during her pawing session. Remember to use all the five senses when working with a powerhouse scene like that. Not that you didnt do it amazingly. I read through it twice. ^.^

It seems to me that you have some very creative ideas in your head. Please keep playing them out!


~Aaralyn~
[RoxasLight]
i agree with Aara its a amazing story, but hey im a guy, with a female solo session its nearly always good, i said nearly. Anyhow yeah the time thing can be a big pain ^^ here is my idea for you, get notepad and start writting, ig you have to take a break just save it and then continue whenever the muse kisses you again, i sincerely hope you continue this most say they will but never do, im one as well to be quite honest dont come after my example ^^

~Kevin~
[Ph0enixInfern0]
Second chapter is nearly done. I've had very little time to complete it and although it is nearly finished, I might not get to finish it any time soon. I've added a few new characters and detail to sexual and non-sexual scenes. Hope you all enjoy it when it's finished.
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